but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
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