WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I believe in your delicious
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
