Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize