he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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