actually, I'm a sock model
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
he thought i was a dude.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
