your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
