Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I'm really busy with my period
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