Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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