my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
