So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
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