We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
