I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I want to fling myself into the sun
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize
