weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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