Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize