you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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