Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
