I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
