he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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