he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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