I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I've blown a few things in my day
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
