Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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