it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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