we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
So much rum. So many feels.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
