Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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