no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
