Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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