I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
