Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
