oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
