Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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