It was confusing and full of hummus
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
