She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize