ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Randomize
