Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
