is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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