it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
