it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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