i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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