that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
