you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
