Sry I called you an 8
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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