Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
