how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I pour the whiskey from now on
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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