well you can't waste a boner
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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