i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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