It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
If I die, sorry about rent.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
