so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
