He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize