I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
