If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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